Finding Sarah

I have not decided whether I will tune into Finding Sarah on OWN next Sunday, or DVR it.  The Tony Awards are on at the same time, and the Tonys will win out.  At least there is class on Broadway.

Sarah Margaret Ferguson, it is time to shut up.  No one wants to hear your sob stories, over and over again.  We've heard these stories before .. and how you finally got it right, only to read once again, that you didn't get it right.  Everyone keeps enabling you.  The Duke of York is an enabler, and so is Oprah Winfrey.  She is using your issues to fatten her already corpulent wallet. 

Now you bleat about your late mom, claiming she beat you as a child because you didn't use the potty!  Cripes, millions of mothers spanked their kids, and the kids turned out all right.  It is not unusual for tired young moms to get frustrated when their little ones miss the potty.  It's normal.  Merde happens.

This is not the first time that you have used the excuse that your mother bolted for another man.  That wasn't your fault.  Your parents' marriage failed.   Your mother put her own needs before the needs of her two young daughters.   That was her fault.   

In previous interviews, you talked about your warm relationship with your mother, visiting her and Hector Barrantes in Argentina.  You even tried to save her property there,  not a smart move, because it put you back in the debt column.

If you had married a young naval officer named Andrew Windsor, whose parents live in the country, and you had an affair that broke up the marriage, no one would have noticed.   The infidelities would not have been plastered on the front pages of the world's media.  You would have gone with your miserable life, without the rest of the world knowing about. 

I believe in helping the less fortunate. I even believe that we need to pay more taxes to support schools, health care, libraries and so on.  But I do not believe in entitlements for entitlement's sake.   The only reason that you now have a show on OWN is because you used to be married to Queen Elizabeth II's second son, Andrew.   You feel you remain entitled to designer clothes, extravagant trips and a lifestyle that most of us can only dream about.  The issue is not about your mother whacking your butt for missing the potty.  The real issue is your inability to accept that you are not a member of the British Royal Family, and, therefore, are not entitled to the privileges of membership in the British Royal Family, and with those privileges comes responsibility.   You eschewed that responsibility and service to the country when you chose to leave the marital bed. 

You are not HRH The Duchess of York.  You are merely styled as Sarah, Duchess of York, as a divorced wife of a peer is entitled to be styled.  But once the divorce absolute came through, you ceased to be royal and a British princess by marriage.  You reverted to being a true commoner with interesting aristocratic and royal lines.   Your father was the great-grandson of the 6th Duke of Buccleuch.    Your father retired from the army in 1968 with the honorary rank of major.  This retirement allowed your father to pursue his passion for polo, which culminated with being named as the Prince of Wales' Polo manager.    He was unfaithful to his two wives, and he was a member of the Wigmore Club, which was not your typical massage parlor.  Nor was it a health spa.

Your education was sparse.  Minor boarding school.   You didn't go to college.  You worked as a secretary, and then headed to Switzerland to work as a chalet girl.  You ended up in bed (and stayed there for several years) with billionaire Paddy McNally (as in the Formula 1 Paddy McNally), a widower with several children.  McNally's wife died in 1980.   McNally, 22 years your senior, was never interested in putting a ring on your finger, although you hung around, waiting, and waiting.  Smart man, Mr. McNally.   Stop playing the victim.  You are not a victim.  You - and you alone - are responsible for your actions and your behavior.  Make that your mantra.

You played with Prince Andrew as a child, so it no surprise that you would met him again as an adult as your parents moved in the same circles.  Your stepfather, Hector Barrantes, was an internationally renowned Argentine polo player.

Allegedly, it was the Princess of Wales who helped heal your broken heart - after Paddy made it clear that you were not going to be his second wife -- and facilitated an introduction to Prince Andrew. 

You like the nice lifestyle of private jets, designer clothes, and luxurious vacations.  But you are an ex-wife, who received very little in the divorce settlement.  Most of the divorce settlement was put in trust for your two daughters, who are princesses because of their father.  Not because of you.  Being the ex-wife of a British prince does not entitle you to any special privileges.   The best thing you can do for your two daughters is to give up this show, give up this charade, get real therapy, talk to a minister, and do something with your life ... and for your life.
If you really want to break the chain of bad decisions, here's what you need to do.  Ditch the TV series, the self-flagellation and the 24hour pity party.  You need to find a job.  A real job, although this might be difficult considering your age and your resumé.  Most of your books were written by others.

How about a job working for a non-profit association or a charity?  I am not talking about a job with a big office and view of the Hudson  River.   A 9-5 job with an hour for lunch and two weeks vacation a year. You would probably have to contribute to your health care and retirement plans.   You would get Christmas Day off, but would probably have to be back at work the next day. 

Releasing tears on cue for the cameras is not going to work.  Give it up.  Understand and accept that you cannot live like a royal without the income to back it up.   You cannot live off your daughters' trust funds.   Move out of Royal Lodge.  Find your own (small) apartment.   Pay the rent.  Stop whining.  It became unbecoming decades ago. 

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/theroyalfamily/8558255/Sarah-Ferguson-No-wonder-no-one-loves-me.-I-am-disgusting.html